Something That Rhymes With Witch
by T-h-e-G-o-l-d-e-n-E-g-g
Summary: When Lily Evans realizes she actually (dare she admit it) likes James Potter, it very well may be too late. Or is it? What can one do when their crush has been stolen by another? Well, it's simple- make him jealous...by dating his best friend, of course!


**Disclaimer: Not Rowling…is that seriously even a question?**

**So…it's been a really long time since I've attempted a story. But, unlike my last one, I promise I won't give up! I already have a few chapters written, and I'll try to update as regularly as possible…so, without further adieu, here's chapter one!**

Chapter 1: New Beginnings

The corridor was dark and cold, filled by an oppressive silence cut only by the shuffle of her black Mary Janes and steady breathing. Portraits snored lightly in their frames, huddled in the shadows cast by the bit of moonlight filtered through the window as it played a game of hide-and-seek behind the thin, grey clouds that leisurely drifted across the sky.

It was the third week into her sixth year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and Lily Evans was on her routine Wednesday night patrol. She had parted ways with her fellow Gryffindor Prefect, Remus Lupin, an hour or so ago when he had heard a suspicious noise on the floor below. While he went to investigate, Lily had suggested that she take the upper floors to cover more ground in a shorter period. Remus had readily agreed, and the pair had split, leaving Lily alone with her thoughts.

Lily usually enjoyed these weekly patrols, accompanied by the tall, sandy haired Gryffindor, who she had been fast friends with since their first year. She was always one to stand up for the weak, and when she had found Remus huddled in a compartment alone, being mercilessly teased by a group of older boys for his run-down appearance, Lily had immediately stepped in. Despite being smaller and younger than these boys, her now infamous redheaded temper had gotten the better of her, and within minutes of screams and threats the boys had fled. Ignoring the young boy's protests that he was okay, and that no, really, he preferred to be alone, Lily had refused to take no for an answer, and instead had seized his trunk in one hand and Remus' arm in the other and dragged them down the hall to her compartment, which she was sharing with her first ever magical friend, Severus Snape.

Although he was older now, and had grown into a handsome young man with clear blue eyes and a pleasant disposition, obscured only slightly by the heavy bags beneath his eyes and the faint scarring upon his face and arms, as well as the dull pallor of his skin, Lily still saw him as the eleven year old boy, intelligent yet shy and unsure of himself. His confidence had grown since then, with help (though she loathed to admit it) from his three best friends: Sirius Black, Peter Pettigrew, and the one (and thankfully only) James Potter. The four of them together were a band of marauders, and adequately called themselves so, constantly wreaking havoc and destroying school property as they went, although Peter and Remus were never quite as bad as James and Sirius, the ringleaders of the group. Lily would never dare say it out loud, but she did think that some of their practical jokes were funny, especially when aimed at a well-deserving Slytherin.

The Gryffindor-Slytherin rivalry had been going on as long as anyone could remember, the cause lost in the passage of time, known only to those who were well versed in the passages of _Hogwarts: A History_ (of which there were very few). Lily Evans, however, a rule-abider in nature, chose to ignore this one unspoken decree. Things may have gone over differently if Lily had known, had grown up in a Wizarding family, surrounded by the traditions of Hogwarts. But then again, maybe not. She was a witch, born from a family of Muggles, kind in nature, but with a raging temper that could make a grown man cower, enough magical strength to back it up, and a mouth to boot. She was a bookworm, but she was also outgoing, a Prefect, but if bothered enough, could be convinced to do about anything, just to prove she could. Lily was a walking contradiction, like a centaur that didn't star-gaze, or a house-elf who wanted working wages. Her befriending of Severus Snape, a greasy-haired, hook-nosed Slytherin, was just another thing to add to the list.

Lily and Severus had met on the local playground by their homes in Surrey when they were nine years old. Lily, who had still been unaware of her true nature, had been a witness to the occurrence of strange things ever since she could remember, whether it was watching flower bloom in the middle of February, or her tea suddenly heating up, even if it had been ice cold; these things were not grand enough to catch the attention of the average passerby, but her family had noticed, and observed these events with a certain guarded astonishment. On this particular day, while sitting on the swings with her older sister Petunia, yet another strange thing had happened. She'd flown. Not the type of takeoff, flap your arms, rise into the sky takeoff that a bird could perform. No, a bit less eccentric than that. It was more of a jump from the swing, which turned into a twenty foot arc, with a graceful landing. Severus, who happened to be lurking nearby, confronted Lily and began to explain the anomaly. From then on the two were inseparable, she absorbing every detail given to her about this magical world, which seemed so fantastic when compared to the suburbs that she knew, and he seeking refuge from his parents' constant arguments. The friendship had continued through their first few years at school, Lily making up excuses and constantly over-looking, and sometimes joining in on, his snide comments about her fellow Gryffindors, James Potter in particular, as well as his sometimes disturbing infatuation with the Dark Arts. Unfortunately, like all good things, this friendship came to an end. It happened only a few short months previous, and from it, Lily learned the sting of anger, hurt, and humiliation that could be caused by a single word. Very few had dared to say it to her, and it had always been from those she disliked already, and knew were rotten to the core, trained to hate those who they believed were filth, those with a "lower status" in the Wizarding World. She had never dreamed she would hear the word Mudblood spat from her best friend's mouth.

Although she told herself she despised the bigoted, pompous James Potter, she did feel she owed him for standing up for her that summer day by the lake, even if he had gone about it in an unconventional manner. She had never thanked him for it, having been too angry and hurt at the time. She supposed he was a bit daft for having tacked on his classic "Go out with me, Evans?" at the end, but his heart had been in the right place.

Lily froze, her hand gripping the cool stone ledge of a wide bay window, astonished at the thought that had just crossed her mind. She hated, no, loathed Potter, yet she had just admitted to herself that she thought his intentions were true. Wasn't it just she, who, hours earlier, had been complaining about Potter to her two best friends, Alice Prewett and Marlene McKinnon, over his latest attempt to enchant the sinks in the sixth floor girl's bathroom to spew lavender bubbles the size of footballs that engulfed the room whenever someone turned on the tap? And she, who the past five years had been humiliated by every public proclamation of his "love", when in reality she knew it was just another attempt to get under her skin, despite Alice's protest otherwise? It was easy for Alice to say, being a romantic at heart, when she had a faithful boyfriend named Frank Longbottom, a pair so perfect that there was no doubt in Lily and Marlene's minds that they would be married someday.

She shook her head in an attempt to clear the strange muddle of thoughts currently clouding her mind, yet the odd pricks of doubt still remained. She could not fathom how she had not yet come to this realization, or why she now of all times knew it to be true. However, maybe she could try to be a tad nicer to him tomorrow. After all, Remus was always urging her to give him a chance, and lately his pranks had been less mean-spirited and instead of singling out the first years and Slytherins as he did in the past, they had become more general and entertaining to all. She had also noticed that Potter hadn't attempted to ask her out a single time this year, which based on his past behavior, was abnormal to the extreme. Lily pondered this, a confused frown wrinkling her brow.

A sudden noise at the end of the hall interrupted her musings, and with stealth which she liked to akin to a ninja, Lily slunk through the shadows, adding a few wobbly summersaults in for good effect. She peered around the corner, scanning the area for any movement and pricking her ears for any noises. All was quiet for a moment, until a soft giggle, followed by a low shushing sounded from the broom closet to the left. Lily rolled her eyes, slightly disappointed in her find. Cases like this were common, and extremely mundane in her opinion. She could never figure out why her peers were so taken with expressing their erm…feelings in the small confines of a dusty, dingy cupboard, accompanied by cobwebs, buckets, and brooms. Rolling her eyes, she sighed and trudged forward, purposely stomping her feet to alert the pair of her arrival. As she got nearer she softened her footsteps, creating the illusion that she was continuing down the hallway. Instead, she silently darted behind a nearby tapestry that depicted one of the various Goblin Rebellions, though of which she couldn't be sure. '_Let the games begin_,' she thought to herself as she pulled her shoes back into the shadow and tucked her bright red plait behind her back to avoid any stray moonbeams.

A muffled curse and a bang alerted Lily of the pair's timely escape. She peered around the edge of the cloth, focusing on the wooden door. Moments later a face peeped out from behind it, framed by long, wavy chestnut hair in a state of disarray, obviously from the…erm…conditions it had just undergone. Lily silently giggled to herself, finding this idea humorous for some reason or another. Two blue eyes, so dark they almost looked violet in the silver light, fanned across the length of the corridor and back. Seeming satisfied, the rest of girl emerged, her long limbs gracefully unfolding from the cramped space. Lily looked the girl up and down, recognizing the olive skin and flashy dark wash bellbottoms, which she had seen many a time over the years. Her emerald eyes narrowed as she stared at the blue lace baby doll top and before she could help herself, she let out an enraged hiss of "That's my shirt!". Quickly Lily clapped a hand over her mouth, hoping no one heard. However, the girl seemed not to notice, as she was too busy helping her companion from the small space. The boy ran his fingers through his perpetually messy jet black hair and straightened his glasses upon his nose as he leaned casually against the stone wall.

Lily shifted to get a better view at the pair, but in her effort managed to hook her Prefect's badge upon a wayward thread. She jerked and thrashed in what she hoped was a silent, discreet manner (it wasn't), but in a matter of seconds she found herself falling through the air. She hit the ground with a soft thud, her knee taking the brunt of the impact. A shadow fell over her prone form and she looked up to see James Potter, his glasses glinting in the light of the crescent moon and that smirk she had grown to hate so well playing on his lips.

"Alright, Evans?" he asked, a hint of amusement in his voice.

"Just swell," came her muffled reply as she buried her face deeper into the itchy wool, whishing she could banish herself from the spot.

Two strong arms heaved her into a standing position and placed her a good few inches from the cloth now crumpled on the floor in case she were to fall again, which, knowing Lily, was a strong possibility.

"I didn't need your help, Potter," she muttered, a mixture of disdain and embarrassment mingling in her voice as she tried to straighten herself and fight the hot blush swelling upon her face.

James, clearly fighting a scoff of disbelief opened his mouth to retort as his partner stepped forward.

"Are you okay, Lily? How's the knee?" the girl asked in a sickly sweet voice, looking upon Lily as if she was a small child who had clearly got what was coming.

Lily glared in the girl's direction, fighting the urge to punch her in the nose then and there.

"Just wonderful, Gemma, thank you for asking," Lily replied, imitating the other girl's tone.

It was no secret that roommates Lily Evans and Gemma Carmichael had hated each other since first year. Gemma, a pureblood witch who descended from an extremely ancient and wealthy Wizarding family, had trounced into their dorm the first night of their first year and confidently claimed the bed closest to the window, trilling that she simply could not sleep without the fresh air. She then had proceeded to direct the other girls into the remaining beds around her, smiling and waving her arms about like the queen. Lily had been immediately put off, a hot coal settling in her stomach as she silently took the girl's orders, her awe at this new world still fresh in her mind, and her mother's words still swirling about in her head: _"Do try to keep your head, Lily dear-this world is entirely different from what we know. Give yourself a few weeks to acclimate, be polite, and you will certainly make friends. I know you'll do great. Your father, Petunia, and I are all so proud of you". _

Not wanting to disappoint, Lily kept her mouth shut for the weeks following, allowing Gemma to take hours in the bathroom, borrow her robes without permission, and continue to flounce about as if she should be worshiped like a princess. Over time, however, her patience slowly eroded, the hot coal in her stomach growing larger and brighter, until one day she finally was pushed over the edge.

It was a month into school when it happened. Lily, after a long day of classes, as well as three tests, including one in Transfiguration, her worst subject, trudged back up to Gryffindor Tower, exhausted and looking forward to a stress-free weekend. She passed through the Common Room, nodding a few murmured hellos to classmates, hiked her bag farther onto her shoulder, and began her ascent up the girls' stairs to her dorm. She could hear the chaos before she saw it- muffled shrieks filled the air, accompanied by the occasional bang. A few girls poked their heads out of their dorms as she passed, looks of either confusion or annoyance crossing their faces, while Lily merely shrugged her shoulders and began to climb faster. As she reached her dorm the sounds became louder. She pushed open the door, a feeling of dread in her stomach, revealing what was truly an absolute disaster. Gemma, who was the source of all of the commotion, was frantically rummaging about the room, tearing through trunks and wardrobes, only to fling each container's insides with an undignified grunt or yell, and move on to the next victim, continuing her rampage. Gemma's best friend, Sophie Thompson, stood leaning against the post of her bed, her face sympathetic and her hand twitching, as if unsure whether to run to her friend's side and help, or just let the episode run its course. Alice Prewett sat on her bed, calmly reading a large tome, decidedly ignoring the din around her. Marlene McKinnon looked up upon Lily's entrance and greeted her with a shrug and an eye roll. Lily made a face back before turning and closing the door with a click. Gemma whipped around at the noise, her mouth opening and her arm raising, but upon realizing it was Lily, quickly lowered her arm. Instead, her gaze shifted to her left, spotting as if for the first time Marlene sitting at her bureau in the corner.

"You!", she screamed, her finger pointing accusingly.

Marlene raised her eyebrows, confusion and shock mingling on her features.

"I know it was you!", Gemma reiterated, her voice raising an octave in her anger.

Alice looked up from her book, Gemma's tone catching her attention. Lily stood frozen by the door, unsure as to what was going on.

"What are you talking about?", Marlene queried, as she slowly sat up from her stool.

"You took my fuchsia kitten heels!", Gemma growled as she began to pace the room, her hands shaking in anger.

Lily and Alice exchanged a look, complete and utter bewilderment taking hold of them.

Marlene's mouth dropped open in shock. "I don't even wear heels…why would I take yours?"

"Oh, don't play dumb with me, blondie," Gemma sneered, "I saw you eyeing them the other week!"

"Yeah, in disgust, maybe! They're the color of cat vomit," Marlene scoffed, crossing her arms over her chest.

"You're just jealous," she sniffed as she stomped over to Marlene's wardrobe, thrust the door open, and began to rip clothing off of the shelves, carelessly throwing them over her shoulder.

"Oi!", Marlene yelled before running across the room and yanking on Gemma's shoulder. "Knock it off, you twat!"

Sophie gasped, her hand fluttering dramatically to her heart.

"How dare you!", Gemma shrieked, her eyes narrowing as she pushed Marlene off. "Just give me back my shoes!"

"I don't have your sodding shoes, nor would I have any desire to take them!", Marlene screamed as she pushed Gemma back. "Now get away from my things!"

"Give me my heels back, and I will gladly get away from this muck," Gemma stated angrily as she picked up a tennis shoe from the pile and tossed it at Marlene's head in punctuation of her sentence.

Marlene ducked and the shoe came straight for Lily. Lily, eyes wide, barely dodged to the side of the flying projectile. The shoe smacked against the wall with a satisfying thunk before dropping gracelessly to the floor. Lily stood up and dusted herself off, anger bubbling in her stomach.

"Bloody hell, what is wrong with you two? Flying shoes, really?", Lily screeched.

Everyone froze, surprised by Lily's outburst. For the past month, she had kept to herself, speaking generally only when she was spoken to, and submerging herself in the library, reading every book she could get her hands on, hoping to learn everything she could about the Wizarding world. She would disappear early in the mornings and not return until late at night, after spending all of her free time reading or with Severus. Her roommates had basically written her off, putting aside any attempt to get to know her better. Due to this, not many knew of her temper, and were therefore startled as her face began to turn a bright scarlet that seemed to match her hair.

"Gemma, Marlene did not take your shoes. If your head wasn't so inflated by your ego, then you would have noticed them sitting right there under your bed! So don't go jumping to conclusions, and don't go rummaging through things that don't belong to you! You are not as special as you think, nor are you as entitled as you think, but you are certainly as ridiculously narcissistic as I thought, if you really believe that Marlene, out of all people, the most laid-back, tomboy-ish girl I have ever met, would want to take your vile, slaggish heels, which you, as an eleven year old, do not even need to be wearing! Are you that desperate to get attention, because honestly Marlene was right, you are a twat!"

Lily panted, the color slowly fading from her face. All of the suppressed rage from the past month had exploded, although not entirely unexpectedly.

Gemma untangled herself from Marlene and primly brushed off her skirt and ran her fingers through her hair, her eyes narrowed and her mouth twisting into a sour expression.

"Well," she sniffed, her voice shaking, "glad to finally know how you feel. You had real potential, Lily. Now you're stuck with these two," she said, gesturing to Alice and Marlene, both of whom were still looking mildly shocked by Lily's speech. "You'll regret ever doing this, mark my words".

And with that closing statement, Gemma turned on her heel and stormed to the door, Sophie scurrying behind her before they both disappeared with the slam of the door. From that moment on, something between Lily, Marlene, and Alice had just sort of clicked. Initially united in their hatred for their roommates, the trio became closer over the years, forming an inseparable bond.

Glaring back into Gemma's slate blue eyes, Lily recalled the feeling of hatred from that day back in first year.

"Good, I'm glad it's nothing too serious. Wouldn't want our precious Prefect injuring herself, would we?", Gemma cooed, sarcasm evident in her voice.

Lily grit her teeth. "Well, I wouldn't have injured myself if you two," she paused for emphasis, her eyes shifting between Gemma and a slightly guilty-looking James, "weren't out after hours doing…well, whatever it was that you were doing…" She trailed off and awkwardly cleared her throat, her emerald eyes sliding off to the side as a slight flush crept up the back of her neck and on to her ears.

"What, going to report us, Lily?", Gemma mocked, a faux pout pulling down the corners of her lips. "You don't want Gryffindor to lose any points, do you?"

Lily glared. "No, I don't, but obviously you two do if you're willing to slink around in the corridors in the dead of night."

James rolled his eyes. "Evans, you know you're not going to take off points. But speaking of slinking, the question begs, why were you hiding behind a tapestry? Practicing your sleuthing skills on us?", he queried, a flicker of amusement evident in his eyes.

"Um…no…what are you talking about, Potter? I wasn't hiding behind a tapestry…", Lily forced a chuckle, the flush spreading from her neck to the entirety of her face. Sighing, she ran her fingers through her thick ginger locks, willing the blush to recede. "Go back to the tower, and don't let me catch you two out past nine again, or there will be consequences."

James and Gemma shared a look, and with a chuckle, turned back in the direction in which Lily had come from, leaving her alone in the corridor, her face still burning bright to match the anger and confusion welling up inside her.


End file.
